Puttin' on the Ritz

      

So we headed out to Phoenix to shoot another episode of Midlife Road Trip. I was especially excited as the agenda called for hot air ballooning, tom-car riding, rock climbing and machine gun shooting.  Most experts agree that these activities are best done outdoors.

Prior to our arrival, it hadn’t rained inPhoenix for like 3 months. Wouldn’t ya know it, it rained for three of the four days we were there and everything but the rock climbing at AZ on the Rocks, was cancelled.
 

Ordinarily I would have been totally bummed, missing out on so much fun, BUT we were fortunate enough to be staying at the Ritz-Carlton in Phoenix. Believe me, there are worse places to be stuck in the rain.

I got to see the touring cast from Boradway’s Mary Poppins Musical perform and entertain guests at an afternoon tea. I got to interview Jeffrey Hattrick, the world’s foremost tea sommelier, (I didn’t even know there was such a thing) and I got to experience the legendary Ritz-Carlton service. The Ritz Carleton in Phoenix definitely earns the Midlife Road Trip Seal of Excellence.

I would check “puttin on the Ritz” off my bucket list, but after this experience, I'm amending my list to to say "Stay at at Every Ritz-Carlton hotel in the world." That's not unreasonable, is it?


...and NO, I didn’t steal the robe…I just borrowed it for the picture:)

Vegas is ADD Paradise

I just got back from a quick weekend jaunt to Vegas.  I took my wife as sort of a valentines gift. My job was to win money and her job was to spend money.  She was a lot better at her job than I was at mine.

Though I’m not much for shopping or gambling, I still dig Vegas - it’s ADD paradise.

Check out what we were able to see, 

all within 100 yards of our hotel! 

Dead Celebrities, pictured with my lovely wife, Denise, and Austin Powers

 Honesty and integrity are important in any business. I liked this guy so I became a customer.

Not just anybody can make two-tone shoes, a white polyester suite with a blue silk shirt, and a comb-over, look cool and classy in an old school mafia kind of way. 

 

 A giant shiny horse. You know how ADD people are about shiny things.

Fake, wonderful, wonder of the world.

Oh, and trucks that deliver Hot Babes direct to you?  I wonder how many girls they carry in one of those trucks…..hmmmmm.  I bet they wouldn’t be so hot if they cut some air vents in the truck.

Bathroom Mirror

     OK, so I go out of town to film an episode of Midlife Road Trip. I return to learn that my wife “saved” the family $90 by purchasing a $140 mirror that was marked down to $50 - some kind of weird female math that they teach in home economics classes in public schools.

     She proudly hung it in the master bathroom. And though I am $50 poorer, I have to admit that it is a nice looking mirror. The only problem is that in placing the mirror, she failed to consider that I don’t always sit down when using the bathroom. So what I see in the mirror is not only bad for my self-esteem on cold mornings, it’s causing me to want to sit down every time I have to go. All those years of perfecting my aim, wasted.